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Settings goals is harder than you think. If you are going through the motions in your daily life find yourself short of time, too busy to catch up with friends or struggling to find quality time for yourself, it’s easy to think you haven’t got time to set new goals and life purpose. It sounds like a big task. One that needs serious thought and dedication. Before you know it, another year has passed, you’re another few pounds heavier and a little more convinced that life isn’t going to change drastically.

I heard a magnificent phrase in the last 24 hours which I think will help you find the time to take a moment to consider setting new and exciting goals.

“90% of people out there are like that….”

Out of context, this doesn’t really mean anything, but let me put it into perspective.

Imagine you are in a job and most of the people there aren’t exactly focused on moving the company forward at the same rate as the people at the top. They just want to get through the day, have a laugh with a few colleagues and go home until it’s action replay tomorrow. If you have been hoping to achieve great things doing what you do with these people around you, THEY are holding back. If everyone you worked with was totally career focused and had the bigger picture in mind, thinking only in terms of the best for a shared common goal, you will have been inspired to achieve more because of your surroundings, and you will have benefitted from the energy that these people are putting into their work and it will generate success, achievement, fulfilment, togetherness and add more happiness to your life.

In reality though, the majority of people are not pushing you forwards at the rate at which we all deserve. Although, most people will feel they work hard enough to deserve more than what they are getting and would try to convince you that there are reasons beyond their control why they are failing, ultimately, they are not taking responsibility and making things happen. Someone may know how to use longer words than you, or appear more knowledgeable than you about something, or do something that makes you feel inferior. You might see this person struggling to succeed or cope with demands of their role and think, “if they can’t do it, well I certainly can’t”. Talking the talk, doesn’t equate to walking the walk. Consider that it may be that these people are simply busking their way through the day to cover up that they aren’t as good as they have made out. Many, many people will blame anything other than themselves on why they have not achieved what is being asked of them.

I knew a salesperson that was the most successful employee in the company. This person earned more than most of the people in senior positions for years. I envied the financial freedom I assumed he would be enjoying, but it turned out he was spending far, far more than he earned and in the end it came to nothing as he lost it all. He could have been set up for life, but I suppose he only blew it because of a lack of focus. He was more bothered about the latest car and gadgets on an impulsive day to day and wasteful basis. This looked like he way enjoying abundance at the time, but is actually an expression of lack of self worth; feeling uncomfortable with having lots of money to the point of having to spend it faster than you can earn it. I would never have considered him as someone that was uncomfortable with wealth, but looking back, it is clear that was the case. He possibly envied me, even though I felt inferior to him!

When it comes to setting goals, if you are doubting that you are going be able to succeed or even make enough money to get by, then remember that most people aren’t ready for wealth or are simply that caught up in the “get up, have breakfast, complain about going to work, go to work, not enjoy work, go home, eat, complain about the day, go to bed” routine. They are not your competition, they are not in the right place (sadly for them) to be competing with you as the chances are they will not be working towards goals that are being focused upon on a daily basis. They are simply not interested and… 90% of people out there are like that”

Incidentally, if you are concerned that you will be defeated by those that are focusing on the same goals as you on a daily basis, meaning you don’t even bother to start working towards that goal, you will probably find out that these will prove to be an ally or healthy competition. Remember that if 90% of the people out there aren’t bothered, that means you are already ahead of 90% of the people, what a head start!

You might have thought it is hard figuring out exactly how to set goals that are truly exciting, but when you realise that only the minority are wanting to take action to truly push ahead, the options really do open up. Have fun with your ideas.

Napoleon Hill says that writing down your goal and repeating it with emotion one of the keys to success. If you find yourself drawing a blank when it comes to deciding on your definite major purpose, here’s a bit of inspiration and found this from Bruce Lee :

Transcript…

My Definite Chief Aim

I, Bruce Lee, will be the first highest paid Oriental super star in the United States. In return I will give the most exciting performances and render the best of quality in the capacity of an actor. Starting 1970 I will achieve world fame and from then onward till the end of 1980 I will have in my possession $10,000,000. I will live the way I please and achieve inner harmony and happiness.

Bruce Lee
1969

I found this here :  http://www.stevepavlina.com/forums/personal-effectiveness/63038-definite-chief-aim-major-definite-purpose-examples.html

The thread goes onto say that Jim Carrey wrote a cheque to himself for $1m and carried it n his wallet for 2 years, at which point he got a real cheque for this amount his role in Dumb & Dumber!

So, there is plenty of information about how to achieve your goals, but how do you discover what they are?

The problem with thinking of exciting goals is that it’s quickly followed by frustration and disheartenment at the sense of an extreme distance from how things are today. With that, a “reality check” swiftly follows and life goes back to normal, with an extra confirmation that exciting goals are not worth thinking about for another day, week or more.

Training yourself to change the “reality check” into the knowing that this is only a subjective limiting belief has got to be stage 1. Emptying the mind of limiting beliefs.

If someone were to ask you what your career/fulfilment goal would be, would you say international rockstar/filmstar etc. I’ve played guitar for 30 years, I’ve half-written hundreds of songs and never finished them off and now the moment has passed I couldn’t give you 10 songs I’d want to finish off.  There are many reasons why we don’t push ourselves forward to what we really want; fear of failure; or maybe the fear of success; embarrassment; being laughed at.

It may be that if you could turn your life back 10 or 20 years you could achieve more success second time around or that it’s easy for certain people to do it because of upbringing, money etc

_________________

I saw Bryan Adams live in about ’94 on the Waking up the Neighbours tour and it was my first big outdoor gig with an international singer songwriter/performer.  What struck me was that he was the most famous person I’d ever seen in concert, he had thousands of people in the palm of his hand and yet you felt he connected with every single person in the crowd, and that everyone liked him back. To be at the centre of such a fantastic atmosphere and to bathe in it for a few hours must feel incredible – and he still does it to this day. That’s what life must be all about – moment’s like that.

We might know our “dream job” but might also be doing next to nothing to achieve it. Why is that? Lack of belief because of passion? Lack of passion because of lack of belief!?   Are we just not that arsed?

The basic statement that is quite common would be wanting to connect with lots of people doing something creative that you are truly passionate about. To do something you truly love and make a connection with other people that love what you do must be fantastic.  But what? How? etc

I remember Paul McKenna (top bloke) saying that when he met Will Smith (another top bloke) he said, “I think you’re a positive inspiration to millions”, to which Will Smith took a moment to think about what was said and replied “Thank you. Thank you, very much”.

Two things about this. 1. What a fantastic compliment and one which can’t be said to many people in the world, and 2. Will Smith took the compliment graciously without feeling unworthy of such a magnificent compliment.  He didn’t make an excuse or feel uncomfortable at such a statement. Good for him. So, can I be you please, Will?

Imagine feeling able to accept such a compliment and genuinely feel that you are actually considered to be a POSITIVE INSPIRATION TO MILLIONS.  That goes on the wish list.

1.  Be a positive inspiration to millions (that gets the juices flowing and yet it’s very vague!)

Let’s sabotage this with the usual; too old, too fat, too ugly, too scruffy, too late to change direction, don’t know where to begin, too many responsibilities, it’s too risky etc etc

So, already, you’re aiming too high, and before you know it, you’ll end up doing nothing.

Aim lower and give up because it’s not exciting OR Aim high and give up because it’s not realistic.

Working on the principle that it’s probably doomed from the start, you might as well fail at something you really want.

THE BEST POSSIBLE CHANCE OF SUCCESS IS TO AIM HIGH.

Now, just the small job of getting rid of those limiting beliefs that have been cultivated all life long – then we might be ready to decide on something.

Until next time.

To summarise the short video in yesterday’s post, there are several parts to the start of it:

1. Definite Purpose + Definite Plan + Action = Attainment

It is not important that the plan is sound or thought out, but it is absolutely important that the purpose is nailed down.

2. All individual achievements are the result of a motive or motives

You can’t ask someone to do something without giving them an adequate motive – the first lesson of sales!

There are 9 basic motives to plant into the mind of the buyer (apparently!)

3.  Any dominating idea / plan / purpose held in the mind through repetition of thought and emotionalised with a burning desire for its realisation is taken over by the subconscious section of the mind and acted upon through whatever natural and logical means that may be available.

Repetition of Idea to the Mind + Belief it will happen = Attainment

This equation sounds very simple. Repetition of idea could just be 5 minutes a day, easy. Belief it will happen; could be a bit tricky but as i don’t know what my idea is yet, don’t know how unrealistic it is.  BUT – Hill says that whatever statement you repeat to the mind, if you do it often enough will bring about the feeling of belief, even if it is a lie!    This sounds quite plausible because many people have inaccurate beliefs about themselves that are as a result of their surroundings, ie. a fear of spiders because of their parents’ fear of spiders, someone that is attractive having no confidence in their appearance etc.

The more enthusiasm and belief behind the statement makes the subconscious mind work more quickly – but if there is little belief – then repetition will generate belief.

Ok, so the definite major purpose needs writing down, committing to memory and repeating with emotion, belief and a spirit of faith.

Just need to think of the purpose…..THE HARD BIT!

After a quick google search for definite major purpose, the man himself appears…

Napoleon Hill – Definite Major Purpose

16 Pages into the book, we learn of Edwin C Barnes having a clear and unwavering desire to work with Thomas Edison which he eventually did, but not until after a few years hard slog. The thing was, though, he had a clearly defined goal. Or, to use Napoleon Hill’s terminology, a DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE, and Barnes intensified the desire along the way which made him DETERMINED TO REMAIN READY [for it to put in its appearance] UNTIL HE GOT THAT WHICH HE WAS SEEKING.

So, what is Hill saying here?  That you will achieve something if you have a increasingly burning desire for it, remain focused on it and do not give up until you get it? Sounds bloody obvious that it would work when you put it like that. Well, it might sound obvious, but why doesn’t everyone do it?  It’s because the hardest part is deciding on a DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE.

What if you do not have a burning desire anymore? What if you never allowed yourself one in the first place? What if you think your chances of achieving your burning desire disappeared when you got a job? Got a mortgage? Got married? Became a parent?

What if you have never been encouraged by anyone to think BIG? Or even worse, you’ve  been DIScouraged from thinking big?

For many of us in the “real” world that haven’t been focused on anything in particular, sometimes for decades, any burning desire to achieve the perfect life would now be simply outmuscled by the worry caused by commitments and responsibilities picked up along the way. On top of that, what if achieving your burning desire now would be impractical and mean leaving home and pissing off everyone around you?

It’s very easy to validate a lack of achievement or fulfilment or to stifle desire because life gets in the way, but it does. However, does it only get in the way because you don’t have a DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE?  After hearing Edwin C Barnes’ story, it sounds like his unquestionable desire would bulldoze through any setbacks and disappointments as if they weren’t there.

This is when I realised that I don’t actually know my DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE.  In fact, just thinking about it makes me switch off.  It’s quite amazing to think that I will give more thought to next weeks shopping list than I will to thinking about my DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE.

Well, this is where it is needs to change.

I remember about five years ago hearing this question for the first time, “what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?”

My immediate reaction was to imagine being an ”International Rockstar” but after about a second, I started to rationalise it and think – well it’s not going to happen realistically is it?

So, the first hurdle in Napoleon Hill’s book is for everyone that doesn’t have a DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE or know how to choose one. Do you choose one? Is it written in the stars for only a lucky few?

So the first challenge is to find out what is my DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE, and it’s very tempting to say “bollocks to it” and go to bed.

If I knew my DEFINITE MAJOR PURPOSE I’d probably stay up a bit later, but seeing as I don’t…

Nighty night all.

Even though I’ve got Think And Grow Rich in Hardback and on my Kindle (which I intended to re-read on holiday but I read David Icke’s Remember Who You Are instead) I remembered that the original copy is in the public domain and there are loads of free e-book downloads.

Here’s the one I just got (too lazy to get up to grab my copy of the book or my kindle!)

http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/newsletter/thinkngrow-download-page.htm

To whoever is reading – hello!

This is one of those things where you say to yourself, “if I write it down, I’ll be more likely to do it…”

Kickstarting a journey to health and true happiness, which comes during a life which is already one which requires an income to keep the family life, the first thing to get right is to be in control of your time, income and expenditure as much as possible.

The challenge is on.

Over the last five years and the many books read, the one that seemed to focus the mind on a goal better than any other, until changing to a job which I thought was the one to change everything but ultimately proved to take time and focus on my goal, was Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich. I underestimated what this book was doing for me at the time, so I stopped following its instructions.

All I know is that then, my financial goal was to have £5,000,000 in the bank by my 40th birthday, which was 5 years away back then, but after a low point at my present job this week, followed by a conversation with one of my brothers that works at the same firm, he suggested that we tackle the book again and document what happens.

I’ll dig out the daily statement and post it on here.